Divorce is not a battle to win, but a problem to solve.
What is divorce mediation?
Divorcing your spouse is painful enough, it doesn’t have to be made far worse by an awful, costly and painful court battle. Mediation is a simpler, cost-effective, non-adversarial alternative to litigation.
Couples who are knowledgeable, well informed and smart enough to choose mediation are always so pleased that they did. Working together with a mediator is dignified, more peaceful and results in far less anger and frustration. Divorce Mediation is a dignified and cooperative process where spouses, who often are very angry, hurt, afraid and/or resentful, work with a trained, experienced, and neutral divorce professional to resolve all of the issues involved in ending their marriage, divorcing respectfully and peacefully, and moving forward positively – no matter how bitter or complex their situation.
- The couple’s finances are thoroughly discussed and equitably distributed.
- Parenting time is discussed, and the most viable parenting solution is worked out.
- Each party’s interests and needs are taken into consideration in finding a solution – the beauty of the mediation process.
- Couples save significant money, significant time and significant stress.
- There are no soaring litigation costs and the process is totally confidential.
This method is highly effective for all economic levels, from high net worth couples to those with more moderate means. The costs savings are immeasurable. Put simply, the goal of mediation is for furious spouses with very complicated issues and complex finances, to reach a win-win agreement, rather than one spouse being victorious and the other defeated.
Why choose divorce mediation?
You divorce peacefully and with dignity
Mediation reduces the adversarial nature of divorces and helps you focus on what is important for your future. You end your marriage peacefully. The mediator’s job is to be sure that both parties’ needs and concerns are addressed. In addition, a good mediator knows all the issues that need to be decided, and makes sure that they’re addressed so that you don’t fight later on, as often occurs with a litigated divorce.
You save a ton of money – a fraction of the cost of litigation
Mediation costs are a fraction of what it would cost to litigate your divorce. For example, a case that costs you jointly in mediation, start to finish, $12,000 ($6,000 each), could easily run upwards of $120,000 ($60,000+ each). That’s money that would be better spent on college tuition, household expenses, or almost anything else.
You save a ton of time
Litigation carries on for many months and in most cases, for years. And in the meantime, neither of you can move on with your lives. Mediation solutions are usually accomplished within a matter of hours, often spread over just a few weeks. Moreover, the mediations are made at your convenience. With litigation, the court dictates your appearances and you have no choice. You have to miss work, pay for babysitters, miss important appointments.
Mediation is confidential
Once signed and properly notarized, the agreement you reach through mediation is legal and binding. However, it is not made public. Information about your personal lives and finances remain private. On the other hand, with litigation, every detail could conceivably end up in the media. At the very least, everyone can hear the details of your lives in the courtroom.
You are in control of making your agreement
Mediation enables you to determine your own future. You tailor the agreement to your and your children’s needs. There is no judge involved who is going to tell you how you or your children will live. And, significantly, you don’t just “agree” or “settle” out of sheer exhaustion, just to get it over with, as you would do with litigating attorneys. That breeds resentment and unhappiness, and these couples, not surprisingly, often find themselves back in the courtroom.
Sheryl-Anne will help with creative ideas for you and your spouse to decide how to divide property, how to divide your assets, how to handle spousal and child support and where the kids will live and how much time each of you will spend with them.
Sheryl-Anne will help you communicate and create an agreement. The result: Decisions that could affect the rest of your lives are made by you, and not handed down by a judge who doesn’t know you, your spouse, or your kids. Once the agreement you reached and you sign it, it is completely legally binding.
Mediation creates positivity
Mediation emphasizes what’s constructive, rather than fueling conflict, as litigation does. Mediators encourage and guide the conversation, helping each spouse hear (possibly for the first time) the needs, concerns, interests and wishes of the other. The environment is neutral, balanced, safe, and confidential. Successful mediation often leads to a better ability to give and take, and therefore, to have non-confrontational discussions in the future, which you couldn’t have before.
Mediation is much easier on your kids
You’re angry and worried. You and your spouse are barely speaking. You don’t seem to agree on anything anymore, except that you want out of your marriage.
You do share several goals: Saving time and money and avoiding the wrenching emotional turmoil of a court battle for yourselves and for your kids. By using a neutral and experienced divorce mediator who will listen to both of you, ensure that you both feel heard, understand the legal concepts, and will help facilitate a workable and lasting agreement.
Huge benefits for high net worth couples
The higher the net worth and the more complex the situation, the larger the benefit from Divorce Mediation. Sheryl-Anne has over 20 years of experience helping couples in the most acrimonious and complex financial situations, unravel their marriage and finances. She enables them and their children to move on to a positive and calm future.
Not all divorce mediators have the knowledge and capability to handle high net worth and/or complex divorce cases. Sheryl-Anne has the educational background as well over twenty years of experience confidentially handling these types of cases and understands the advanced terminology, the complex forms of income and other concepts that frequently arise in high net worth and complex divorce cases. Sheryl-Anne will be able to understand each spouse’s position, as well as the complex emotional and financial issues that might hinder settlement.
Couples in mediation typically stick to their agreement
When both you and your spouse have agreed to the terms of the settlement, you are both far more likely to stick to it, than if the terms were dictated by an outsider (e.g., a judge), or after you’ve settled due to exhaustion or exasperation with the litigation process.
The more difficult or complex your situation, the greater the benefit from mediation
The greater the emotional conflict and the greater the benefit from the divorce mediation process. Privacy is paramount in divorce mediation and the emotional and cost savings are massive. Sheryl-Anne has the educational background as well over twenty years of experience confidentially handling very complex cases and will be able to understand each spouse’s position, as well as the complex emotional and financial issues that might hinder settlement.
You still can have an attorney present, if you wish
Some people feel more comfortable having an attorney to consult with between mediation sessions or even during. Either way, you both can have your own attorneys review the settlement before you sign it, to be sure that your legal rights are being protected.
Financial Planners, divorce coaches and psychologists can be involved
Sheryl-Anne often retains a neutral divorce financial planner to assist with dividing your finances and to help you both figure out how to manage your future expenses.
Divorce coaches and psychologists are always a welcome addition, if the couple chooses.
Sheryl-Anne can help you resolve often difficult, complex and heated issues with a fair and reasonable outcome and avoid going to court. She is one of the very few advanced accredited mediators, highly experienced and highly skilled at creating an environment of calmness, respect and dignity, utilizing her decades of experience as a family law attorney and compassionate mediator. Sastow Law & Mediation will prepare your Agreement and all Divorce Documents required by the Court and file them on your behalf, without you having to step foot in a courtroom. Sheryl- Anne’s process enables you to focus on your family’s future.